The Hand That Rocks the Wheelchair

Meg offers to check on Joe while Bonnie is out of town; Stewie tries to become more evil.

Departamento de Justiça, Classificação, Títulos e Qualificação

Family Guy

The Itchy Brain Simulation

When a mistake comes to light, Sheldon makes Leonard walk a mile in his shoes; Penny decides to confront Raj's ex.

When a mistake comes to light, Sheldon punishes Leonard; Penny decides to confront Raj's ex.

The Big Bang Theory

The Thanksgiving Decoupling

When the gang decides to spend Thanksgiving at Mrs. Wolowitz's house, Sheldon protests; Leonard and Penny deal with an error from her past.

When the gang decides to spend Thanksgiving at Mrs. Wolowitz's house, Sheldon protests.

The Discovery Dissipation

Amy and Leonard try to help Sheldon deal with his shame; Raj stays with Bernadette and Howard for a week.

Amy and Leonard try to help Sheldon deal with his shame; Raj stays with Bernadette and Howard.

The Cooper Extraction

While Sheldon is in Texas, the rest of the gang realize how much he has changed their lives as they decorate the apartment Christmas tree.

While Sheldon is in Texas, the rest of the gang realize how much he has changed their lives.

The Hesitation Ramification

As Leonard tries to help Penny with a disappointment, Penny asks him a bold question about their relationship; Sheldon wants to learn how to be funny.

Penny asks Leonard a bold question about their relationship; Sheldon wants to learn how to be funny.

The Occupation Recalibration

Sheldon must learn how to relax when he is forced to take a vacation; Leonard tries to support Penny when she quits her job; Bernadette needs to replace one of Stuart's comic books.

Sheldon must learn how to relax when he is forced to take a vacation.

The Convention Conundrum

Unable to get Comic-Con tickets, Sheldon tries to hold his own convention and ends up spending a wild evening with James Earl Jones; the ladies try to act maturely.

Unable to get Comic-Con tickets, Sheldon tries to hold his own convention.

A Monkey Stole My Baby

A monkey steals a baby, a woman gets her ultimate dream granted, and how it's possible to lose the race before it even starts.

A monkey steals a baby, a woman gets her ultimate dream, how to lose the race before it even starts.

The Misery Index

Randall Park

Conan

The Serenity Now

Jerry tries to reveal more of his feelings on the advice of his new girlfriend (Lori Loughlin). With Jason Alexander.

Jerry's new girlfriend encourages him to express his emotions.

Seinfeld

Hotties Versus Nerds 2.0

Twelve nerdy guys compete against 12 beautiful women.

Wipeout

Gorillas in Our Midst

Competitors face obstacles including Monkey Business, School Daze and Gold Rush Petrified Forest.

Contestants, including a professional boxer and a stay-at-home dad, face the Ballsy-Go-Round, Mesh Mosh Run and Swinging Cereal Killer.

Freiwillige Selbstkontrolle der Filmwirtschaft

Professional boxer and a stay-at-home dad face compete.

Take Me Out at the Ballgame

Q, Murr, Joe and Sal get drenched at a water park, and play a wild round of TP basketball at a grocery store; the loser strikes out while jockeying for a ball from New York Mets pitcher Noah Syndergaard.

Q, Murr, Joe and Sal get drenched at a water park, and play TP basketball at a grocery store.

Impractical Jokers

The Marathon Man

Sal, Murr, Q and Joe climb to the Top of the Rock for some awkward interactions, then "wet" their appetites at a bagel shop; the evening's loser takes a run across the Brooklyn Bridge that is anything but inspiring.

The evening's loser takes a run across the Brooklyn Bridge that is anything but inspiring.

Slave

Marie accuses Ray and Debra of turning Ally into a slave when they start giving her chores around the house.

Marie accuses Ray and Debra of turning Ally into a slave when they start giving her chores.

Everybody Loves Raymond

Whose Side Are You On?

Ray catches Debra poking fun at him in front of the children, then realizes his mother did the same thing when he was a youngster.

Ray catches Debra poking fun at him in front of the children.

Lateness

Debra assures her husband she will be on time for an awards dinner, then her hair gets caught in a curling iron.

Debra assures her husband she will be on time for an awards dinner.

Dance Fever

After receiving a business award, George humiliates himself by dancing at a party in front of his entire staff.

George humiliates himself by dancing at a party in front of his staff.

George Lopez

She Drives Me Crazy

Despite his misgivings, George teaches Carmen to drive; Carmen and Jason break up; Benny has a run-in with the law.

Despite his misgivings, George teaches Carmen to drive; Carmen and Jason break up.

George Goes to Disneyland

George agrees to reward Max with a trip to Disneyland for improving his grades, but then he makes up an excuse to get out of following through on his promise.

George agrees to reward Max with a trip to Disneyland for improving his grades.

And the Alley-Oops

Caroline makes an effort to support Bobby's love of bowling but fears she is his bad luck charm when things go awry; Sophie worries baby Barbara is not smart enough.

Caroline makes an effort to support Bobby's love of bowling but fears she is his bad luck charm.

2 Broke Girls

And the Rock Me on the Dais

Caroline's ex-boyfriend, Candy Andy, shows up at a press junket being held to promote the film about Caroline's life; Bobby gets jealous over Caroline and Candy Andy's reconnection.

Candy Andy appears at a press junket being held to promote the film about Caroline's life.

And 2 Broke Girls: The Movie

The women and the diner gang prepare for the premiere of the film about Caroline's life; Caroline and Max contemplate their future at the diner.

The women and the diner gang prepare for the premiere of the film about Caroline's life.

Pilot

Experienced waitress Max Black teams up with her new co-worker, formerly rich Caroline, for a business venture.

Experienced waitress Max Black teams up with her new co-worker for a business venture.

The One With Ross' Sandwich

Threatening notes on Ross' lunches cause concern among his co-workers; Monica makes a literature class more challenging, to the dismay of the other students; Monica and Chandler try to keep their relationship a secret.

Phoebe puts notes on Ross' lunches; Joey covers for Monica and Chandler's trysts.

Friends

The One With the Inappropriate Sister

Phoebe helps the Salvation Army and learns some truths about New Yorkers; Rachel gets a date with her neighbor who has a close relationship with his sexy sister; Joey tries to write a play in which he can be the star.

Phoebe volunteers at the Salvation Army; Rachel dates Danny and meets his sister.

The One With All the Resolutions

Ross vows to try something new; Joey resolves to learn guitar from Phoebe; Rachel gives up gossiping.

The new year tests the gang's resolutions to learn new things and stop gossiping.

The One With Chandler's Work Laugh

Monica is put off by the laugh Chandler uses to impress his boss (Sam McMurray); Ross shocks everyone by dating Janice (Maggie Wheeler).

Chandler and Monica start socializing with his boss and wife.

The One With Joey's Bag

Phoebe meets her estranged father (Bob Balaban) at her grandmother's funeral; Joey's fondness for an expensive bag loses him an audition; Chandler tells perfectionist Monica that she is useless at massage.

Phoebe finally meets her father at her grandmother's funeral; Joey carries a purse.

The One Where Everybody Finds Out

Ross must prove to his boss that he is sane in order to return to work; Phoebe finds out about Monica and Chandler's relationship; Ross hunts for a new apartment.

The pals who know Chandler and Monica's secret turn the tables on the pair.

The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey

Chandler gets nervous when everyone learns about Monica; Joey's new girlfriend (Soleil Moon Frye) gets physical; Ross moves into a new apartment but fails to impress his new neighbors.

Commitment scares Chandler; Joey's new girlfriend is brutally physical with him.

The One With the Cop

Phoebe finds a police officer's badge and goes on a spree of arrests until she meets up with the owner; Joey thinks he's in love with Monica; Ross buys a couch but won't pay to have it delivered.

Phoebe has some fun when she finds an NYPD badge; Ross buys a couch and won't pay for delivery.

The One With Rachel's Inadvertent Kiss

Rachel worries about a kiss she gives to a job interviewer (Steve Ireland); Monica observes Phoebe's romantic bliss; Joey is arrested for stalking a sexy neighbor.

Rachel kisses her job interviewer; Joey falls for a woman in Ross' building.

The One Where Rachel Smokes

Rachel tries to impress her boss by smoking, which gives Chandler fond memories of his former addiction; Ross's son and Joey audition for the same part in a commercial.

Rachel feigns smoking to impress her nicotine-addict boss (Joanna Gleason).

The One Where Ross Can't Flirt

Ross competes with Chandler for the attentions of a pizza deliverywoman (Kristin Dattilo-Hayward); Joey discovers that his guest-starring role on "Law & Order" was cut while watching the show with his proud grandmother.

Ross and Chandler both flirt with a pizza delivery gal; Joey impresses grandma.

The One With the Ride Along

Joey tries to save Ross' life when he thinks he hears gunshots while on patrol with Phoebe's police officer boyfriend.

Joey protects one of his pals during a ride-along with police officer Gary.

Dungeons & Wagons

Stan gets involved in drag racing to spice up his marriage; Hayley breaks up with Jeff, who joins Steve's online gaming world.

Stan gets involved in drag racing to spice up his marriage; Hayley breaks up with Jeff.

American Dad

Iced, Iced Babies

Steve's new relationship with his girlfriend gives Francine empty-nest syndrome; Roger tries to enroll in college with Haley.

Steve's new relationship with his girlfriend gives Francine empty-nest syndrome.

Of Ice and Men

Francine supports Stan's long-suppressed love of competitive figure skating until he ditches her for a new partner.

Francine supports Stan's long-suppressed love of competitive figure skating.

Irregarding Steve

Roger and Steve set their sights on New York City, where Roger loses everything on Wall Street trying to get fame and fortune.

Roger and Steve set their sights on New York City, where Roger loses everything on Wall Street.

Trading Places

When Chris and Meg trade roles with their parents, Chris works at the brewery and Meg runs the house.

Dirección General de Radio, Televisión y Cinematografía

When Chris and Meg trade roles with their parents, Chris goes to work and Meg runs the house.

Tiegs for Two

The dry cleaner loses Peter's favorite shirt; Brian and Quagmire compete for the affections of each other's former flames.

Brian and Quagmire compete for the affections of each other's former flames.

Turner Broadcasting System Schedule (Eastern Time)

Tuesday, March 2