Push-Down Coffee and a Working Turn Signal

When Christy's car dies, Bonnie refuses to let Adam loan her money for a new one.

Instituto de Cinematografía y de las Artes Visuales

Freiwillige Selbstkontrolle der Filmwirtschaft

Departamento de Justiça, Classificação, Títulos e Qualificação

A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer

When Lindsey asks Alan to move in with her, Charlie will do anything to get him to agree to it.

Two and a Half Men

A Pudding-Filled Cactus

After moving in with Lyndsey, Alan continues to have a rendezvous with Melissa at Charlie's house.

Hookers, Hookers, Hookers

Lyndsey and Eldridge move into Charlie's house after their home burns down.

The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel

Alan pretends to be Charlie when he goes out on the town; Charlie sneaks off for cosmetic surgery.

Twanging Your Magic Clanger

Charlie has difficulty dealing with dating a slightly older woman.

The Crazy Bitch Gazette

Charlie's girlfriend gets fed up with his stalker, Rose.

When the dolphin mascot of Miami's NFL team is abducted, Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey), a zany private investigator who specializes in finding missing animals, looks into the case. Soon Miami Dolphins players are kidnapped too, including star player Dan Marino (Dan Marino), making Ace's sleuth work even more pressing. Working with Dolphins representative Melissa Robinson (Courteney Cox), Ace closes in on the culprits, but not before many ridiculous misadventures.

Dirección General de Radio, Televisión y Cinematografía

The goofy sleuth (Jim Carrey) sets out to find the Miami Dolphins' missing mascot, Snowflake.

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Legendary pet detective Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) returns for another adventure when he's coerced out of retirement while on a soul-searching retreat in the Himalayas. He must now retrieve an endangered white bat from a village located in Africa. The sacred animal was offered up as a wedding dowry from the Wachootoo prince to the Wachati princess, and, if Ace can't track down the culprit behind the kidnapping in time, civil war will break out between the two rival tribes.

Pet detective Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) pursues a kidnapped white bat through the African jungle.

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls

Back From Vacation

Michael returns from his Jamaican vacation; an e-mail of a racy vacation photo makes the rounds of the office.

An e-mail of a racy vacation photo makes the rounds.

The Office

Traveling Salesmen

Andy suggests that Michael team up the staff for sales calls; Dwight tries to cover for Angela when she misses a deadline.

Andy suggests Michael pair up the staff for sales calls.

Get whole-brain support with NeuroQ! NeuroQ is formulated to help maintain healthy brain function, clear thinking, and memory.

NeuroQ is formulated to help maintain healthy brain function, clear thinking, and memory.

Forgetful? Try THIS trick!

This is a special presentation of Cutlery Corner. Blades of Summer has 120 total pieces including a choice 26" sword, three piece Daisho Dragon sword set, a Bio Machete, bowies, tactical knives and a 21 piece kitchen set. FLEX PAY AND FREE SHIPPING.

This is a special presentation of Cutlery Corner. Blades of Summer has 120 total pieces.

Blades of Summer

5 Makeup Tips 4 You

Join Cindy Crawford and Ellen Pompeo as they discuss their busy lives and the breakthrough skin care discovery that keeps them looking their best. Take a trip to the stunning French countryside to see a rare French melon that defies aging.

Cindy and Ellen discuss busy lives and skin care advances to keep them looking great.

Cindy Crawford and Ellen Pompeo share secrets

Define your body with PiYo. Chalene Johnson's new lower-impact workout series combining the muscle-sculpting benefits of Pilates, Yoga and fluid motion all-in-one!

Define your body with PiYo. Chalene Johnson's new lower-impact workout series.

PiYo Workout!

Have you or a loved one been diagnosed with lung cancer? You may be entitled to compensation!

Lung Cancer From Asbestos?

Define your body with PiYo. Chalene Johnson's new lower-impact workout series combining the muscle-sculpting benefits of Pilates, Yoga, and fluid motion all-in-one!

Combining the muscle-sculpting benefits of Pilates, Yoga, and fluid motion all-in-one!

The PiYo Craze from Beachbody!

Regain independence and enjoy greater mobility with the compact design and long-lasting battery of portable oxygen.

Regain independence and enjoy greater mobility.

Oxygen Therapy Innovation

In a Pinch

The locals are upset over a controversial lobster tank game.

Bar Rescue

To Protect and to (Over) Serve

Taffer tries to straighten out a former Philly detective who now owns a bar, and hits the bottle hard after years on the force.

Straightening out a former Philly detective who now owns a bar and hits the bottle hard.

Whipped Into Shape

After gambling his life savings on a run down Las Vegas bar, a desperate owner tries out a fetish night to whip up new business.

After gambling away his savings, a desperate owner tries out a fetish night to whip up new business.

Weird Science

Two scientists struggle with the correct formula to run a successful bar.

Down and Out in Las Vegas

After years of running a successful bar in Las Vegas, all bets are off for an owner who spends more time drinking than running his bar.

All bets are off for an owner who spends more time drinking than running his bar.

Stix and Stones May Break Your Bar

After a decade of success, a drag racing bar owner sees his profits go up in smoke.

Pudding and a Screen Door

Jill becomes a new woman after returning from her wellness retreat; Bonnie is offended when she refuses to pay for lunch; Christy's plans for the future are thrown off track following disappointing news.

Jill becomes a new woman after returning from her wellness retreat; Christy gets disappointing news.

Charlotte Brontë and a Backhoe

Bonnie locks horns with Jill's inner-strength coach, Miranda; Christy struggles to bounce back after being rejected from law school.

Christy struggles to bounce back after being rejected from law school.

Esta Loca and a Little Klingon

Christy and Bonnie help Jill get sober again; Christy's boyfriend is less than understanding when it ruins his birthday weekend.

Christy and Bonnie help Jill get sober; Christy's boyfriend is annoyed when it ruins his weekend.

Eight Cats and the Hat Show

Christy gets a surprising offer from her boyfriend; Bonnie struggles to be the stable one in her relationship after Adam experiences a devastating loss.

Christy gets a surprising offer from her boyfriend; Adam experiences a devastating loss.

Crazy Snakes and a Clog to the Head

When the ladies bring a meeting to a women's prison, Bonnie is attacked by an old acquaintance; Christy helps Bonnie make amends.

When the ladies bring a meeting to a women's prison, Bonnie is attacked by an old acquaintance.

Paramount Network Schedule (Eastern Time)

Monday, September 20